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Self-ish

Self-ish

This time last year, I did a very uncharacteristic thing and quit my job (it’s all detailed in the first post I decided to publish to this site). A lot has happened in a year… but I revisit my own words from that particular post— and the journey to being able to write it— often. If there is one thing that has changed significantly in the last 365 days (aside from getting married!), it’s been how I have encouraged myself to be more “selfish” with my time and energy, which has involved constantly thinking about self care.

We’ve been taught since childhood not to be selfish; rather, to be considerate. “Be generous,” our parents and teachers all say. It hasn’t been until adulthood that I’ve had anyone tell me to be generous to myself. My decision last year was the best one I could have made for myself — to be rightfully “selfish” and embark on a journey to explore how I actually need a bit more of that spirit in my everyday to feel alive, feel fully present, and to be able to be my most generous self. In short, I f**king stood up for myself. In a more meaningful way than I ever have in my almost thirty years of life.

In my own world, I like to refer to it as self-ish, to maintain the concept of being centered around the self but without the linguistic history and negative baggage that come with the term; for me, being self-ish is about the pursuit of finding one’s truest self in the most trivial to most complex moments of everyday life. That’s why to me, self care is not selfish, but it is self-ish (and rightfully so).

What this has meant in my every day: a self care routine that consists of rituals of all sizes and levels of commitment, like using a jade roller every single morning, calling 305 Fitness my second NYC home, confidently saying “no,” and not beating myself up when there are times I just feel like doing nothing because I am tired and need time to recharge. I am definitely still learning to get more comfortable with the last two. :)

In the meantime… I believe that I’m making strides to live more in the moment every day, now more than ever. Do you have a self-ish story? Would love to hear!

Grace

Grace

Dimanche

Dimanche